It was a Thursday. My daughters first school dance was that night. A bit young in grade 5 and being only 10 years old if you ask me, but I deal with this issue in another blog post. My Daughter’s First Dance Part 2
This blog post starts after the girls had gone off to school one rainy April morning. My husband tells me that he wants to go at 6:30 before the dance (Madison is sleeping at my parents house tonight) to take pictures of Madison all dressed up and looking beautiful. I said “ok” and asked if he thought he should just go or if we should all go. Rob said he thought we should all go so Madison feels really special and loved. As I stood at the living room window, looking at the girls waiting for the school bus across the street, I pondered what Rob had just proposed. The Holy Spirit came upon me and opened the eyes of my understanding and I was instantly aware of the danger and folly in Rob’s suggestion. Now I need to point out that Rob’s suggestion seems perfectly good and normal. According to our society this is what good loving parents do. They support and encourage the good times, worldly successes, and the likes. And to be honest just 2 months ago I would have went right along with Rob, truly believing we were doing Madison good by supporting her and showing her our love. I would not have seem the inherent harm lurking underneath the shadows, hidden from our view, because our spiritual senses are deadened and we are blinded to God’s ways.
But danger there is and oh what harm it can cause!! In an instant the Holy Spirit allowed me to see that by making a huge deal out of this night, the night of her first dance, we are in fact entrenching in her the follies of this world, the dangers, the things that take us away from Jesus and His grace. If we made Madison feel special, feel loved in this moment, she would forever associate dances with good feelings and love, and this would continue to draw her to similar situations all her life (or until God’s heals her of it). I for one, do not want my children drawn to the things of this world because I know where that leads. To partying, going to bars, drinking, drugs, dancing, sex, pregnancy, and the list goes on… Believe me, I’ve been there, done that!! About Me These things lead us away from Jesus, not towards Him. Why would we want that for our children?
To be honest, I would much rather and I will be happier if Madison calls me after the dance tonight crying because she had a horrible time. This is what I pray for. Not because I am mean and cruel and I don’t love my daughter, it is because I do love her that I want it. I want Madison to associate such experiences with negative feelings so she is less likely to be drawn to them in the future.
Instead of making a big deal of those things that are of can eventually become harmful, let us be parents who celebrate those things that matter, those things that bring our children closer to the Church and to Jesus. Make a big deal out of Baptisms, First Holy Communions, Confirmations, Sunday Masses, when your 6 year old gives her heart to Jesus The day my 6 year old gave her heart to Jesus, when your teen comes to know Jesus in a real and personal way, Marriages, and grandchildren. I could go on but you get the point. It is these moments that we want entrenched into the hearts and souls of our children. These are the things we want our children drawn to throughout their lives. To the Church and To Jesus. This is the safest path for them.
I pray that the Lord would open up the eyes of our souls so that we may all see the hidden dangers lurking in every corner. May parents understand the ways of God so that we may stay safe ourselves and keep our children safe from harm. Lord do not allow us to be lost in our own blindness, for how can we be our children’s’ guides if we are blind ourselves. Heal our blindness and in us deepen wisdom and understanding so that we may raise our children Your Way and not ours. Your ways are not our ways oh Lord!! Your ways are better, safer, and perfect. Jesus, we trust in You!!
What things do you celebrate in your life and in the lives of your children? Are these things you are celebrating things of the world or things of God? Are they leading your child slowly away from the Church and Jesus or towards Him?
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