The night before Madison’s first school dance, Madison came to me and told me that dad said she was not allowed to slow dance with any boys. Madison is only in grade 5 and 10 years old. The Catholic school Madison goes to should not even be hosting dances for this grade. It is way too young!! Anyway, it’s reality and I need to deal with it now. So here we go!! Madison asked if we could talk as she did not understand why she was not allowed to slow dance with boys. Madison was also trying to talk me into allowing her to slow dance with boys and then I could convince dad to change his mind (I’ve been a child once I know the tactics!!). What started out with me saying “no” and “dad said no” turned into our first ever talk about sex, alcohol, drugs, and some of the dangers the world and Satan has set for those entering into their teen years.
I explained to Madison what sex was very simply and Madison nonchalantly said “oh ok”. Madison had no idea what sex was and for that I am thankful. I was the first one to talk to her about it. I think it is very important for a parent to be the first one to talk to their children about sex and not their friends or the media or even schools. It needs to be a parent. I am so grateful Madison has a group of friends that are all still very innocent. This saved Madison from the confusion that would have been caused if she received wrong information about sex from a friend. (Like when I was 5 years old and was introduced to sexual disordered play, which confused and almost destroyed me.) About Me
In summary, I told Madison that slow dancing with boys at 10 years old can lead to closer more sexualized dancing at 13, to kissing boys at 15, to touching each other at 16, to dancing, partying, alcohol, drugs, and sex at 17 and beyond. I told her its a slippery slope, a dangerous path to go down and it all starts from slow dancing with a boy at 10 years old. I told her she needs to be aware of these dangers and protect her heart and soul from these dangers. I talked to Madison about the importance of staying within the safety of the Catholic Church, of attending mass, of going to regular confession, of praying everyday so that she can have a relationship with Jesus, etc. Madison got it, she is smart, and she has a heart that is drawn to the good and to Jesus. Thank God for that!! Madison got angry and said she would punch any boy that tried to grab her or kiss her. I told Madison I was glad she was angry and righteously so she should be angry if any boy tries to violate her and take away her purity. I let Madison know her purity is something that is so precious and should be protected and safeguarded at all costs. This purity will be a beautiful gift she can give her husband or Jesus one day. I told Madison that on her 13th birthday mom and dad were going to give her a beautiful ring, a promise ring to herself and Jesus. A ring that said out loud “I, Madison, am going to wait until I am married to have sex (or any kind of physical relationship at all) or I will keep myself pure for Jesus, Himself, if I choose not to marry. The ring will be a symbol of her commitment to protecting her purity at all costs.
Needless to say Madison is not allowed to slow dance with any boys at her first dance or any dances for that matter. I’m not even happy that she is going to the dance at all. But regardless of how I feel, it has started, the slippery slope into the teen years. It’s times to start talking to Madison about the dangers out there, about the snares of the devil, so as to prepare her to live a life in, through and with Christ.
Would you allow your 10 year old to slow dance? Would you let them go to the dance at all?
Have you talked to your tween or teen about sex, alcohol, drugs and the dangers that lie within these things? Don’t wait too long to do so. Someone else may beat you to it and fill your child’s mind and heart with lies.
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